Isn't it Great When Things just DON'T Work?*

*Thanks VW

People have laughed at me when I have finally lost it with some piece of rubbish that is supposed to work but doesn't; they think that my reaction is illogical or even childish. I have mentioned this sort of thing hereabouts before: the printer that never worked (I jumped up and down on it); the second printer that worked for three months (I threw it across the room - it disintegrated beautifully) the new VCR that refused to play videotapes that played everywhere else (a 4lb club hammer dealt with that one most satisfyingly) the later VCRs that had the same problem (down the rubbish chute with a satisfying crash at the bottom).

Surely some of you when working on a car have felt the strongest desire to put a hammer through the windscreen? No? OK watch the video - no not me, just another bloke who has obviously "had it"! Thanks to CM who found this gem.

Edit: I found a YouTube response to the video:





À bientôt

VISTA ("tm")

Hello again after a long gap. I have been quite busy and also rather lacking in inspiration, though thanks to one of my regular visitors, I have a Fulvia idea or two.

This piece (rant) is another that does not concern our favourite motor-car; it is about computers. Since one way or another, all of you must be using a computer to read this, I feel justified in claiming to be at least relevant.

Here’s what my dictionary says about VISTA:

vi’sta n. long narrow view as between rows of trees; long succession of remembered or anticipated events etc. Mental prospect or retrospect, (opened up new vistas or a new vista to his ambition); hence ~ed (~ad) a. [It. = view (visto seen, p.p. of sedere see f. L. Videre)]

A few things to ponder here: I especially like “long narrow view” whilst “long succession of [...] anticipated events” is to me, profoundly depressing.

No doubt you will have guessed that I have just acquired a new computer, and so I have. A nice thing I suppose, with lots of memory, a huge disk drive and dual-core processor etc. All well and good but for effing VISTA.

What a con! Virtually nothing works with it; most of those software CDs which one has stored carefully (or in a plastic bag in my case) are useless or virtually so. Nearly all those old friends, programs that were perfectly satisfactory, will not work in VISTA. I prefer not to mention the hardware position… Even worse, being in France, I have the French version, which I suppose is good for my French, if not for the migraines. And guess what? Uncle Bill will only provide other languages if one has one of the top-of-the-range versions of the system. Stingy I say. And, every time you want to do something, there’s the pop-up asking for authorisation, followed by yet another question.

Oh yes, VISTA looks nice and there is a good HELP section, but what’s the point? Apparently MS committed $500,000,000 just for the launch of VISTA. Oh dear; all that money (never mind what it actually cost) for a wash-out.

It seems that I have come late on the scene: Microsoft has delayed the putting to death of XP from January to June next year, following what appear to be howls of anguish from the professionals and perhaps mugs like me (if MS actually listens to us virtual cannon-fodder).

As soon as I can arrange it, this computer is going to be formatted – yes, the hell with it, XP is going in and VISTA can rot in the recycle bin.

You have been warned.